Those Were the Days!!!!

Remember the good ole days? For me, the good ole days were back in the 70's and 80's in a small town in Mississippi. Fun fact: I was born and raised in the same little town that claims the birth of Oprah Winfrey. That's right....Kosciusko, Mississippi....the birthplace of brilliant people! Life was so simple back then.

We had a PARTY LINE.  I remember picking up the rotary phone that hung in the kitchen and slowly lifting my index finger off the metal hanger-upper-thingy  in an effort not to disturb the person who might have been  in a conversation with someone on the line. Several houses shared a single phone line. Ms. Dicey, who lived next door to us, would give me the what-for if I picked up more than once while she was having her daily gab-fest with one of her other widow friends. Those were the days!

It is hard to believe that there was a time in my life when I remembered my friends' actual phone numbers! I can still remember Granny's number...289-2465....Christie's 289-7394...Jennifer's 289-6786.....April's 289-5928.....Now, I simply scroll down to the person's name and tap it with my finger. Times have changed! I also remember actually using a payphone! I remember when the cost went from 25 cents to 35. How annoying it was to keep up with that extra dime! Those were the days!

Some of my favorite memories as a teen are from hanging out with my friends at school. We'd sit in the hallways before school started (that is, until we were told there would be no more sitting in the halls...then we resorted to sitting elsewhere. I'll just leave that one alone) and discuss all the important happenings around the metropolis of Attala County. Lunch was more than a meal. Lunch at Kosciusko High School in the 80's was a social soiree! This was the time we'd plan our gatherings for the weekend. There is just no substitution for human interaction. We had no cell phones. We had no iPods. We had no laptops. Those were the days!

Have you walked into a middle school or high school lately? Go check it out. Kids have their faces planted in their electronic devices the entire 30 minutes allowed for chewing their sandwiches.  Without looking up, they seem to be on auto-pilot as those around them do the same. I am all for technology and I love that my children have access to so much information. However, I can't help but wonder how much more bright their world would be if they would just LOOK UP and interact with their peers. I understand that it's a "new age" and "times have changed," but is it all really for the better?

Mr. Hull---totally interacting with the students!

I wonder what would happen if teens were asked to leave their devices home for a while. They'd be forced to go to the library and actually FIND A BOOK when research is needed in class. Taking out an iPhone to google on 3G wouldn't be an option.  Kids would be forced to look at each other as they eat lunch.  Surely this would cause interaction and conversation between friends.  Maybe they'd even learn something about each other! I bet my children would flip their lids if they weren't able to text me things like,"Staying after school," "Plz bring my hw," "Starbucks?" What would teens do without being able to listen to their choice of music while moseying down the sidewalk? How would they survive the bus ride home without earphones or texts from friends?

I hope kids today realize the importance of human interaction.  Texts and emails aren't sufficient tools for getting to know each other.  Inflection of voice and the blinking of eyes add so much to a conversation. If we look up, we may find someone interesting.  Just put the technology down long enough to realize who is around you.  Enjoy your teen years with your friends.  There will be plenty time for texting when you're old and living in different cities.  Just imagine.....you can look back on these times and remember things like lunchtime gossip, class projects, road trips(where everyone is involved in a conversation INSIDE the vehicle and not via text) and late-night slumber parties full of giggles and secrets.  You can pick up the latest craze in technology and reminisce with your friends..."THOSE WERE THE DAYS!!!"

Is it just me or is it HOT IN HERE?!

                                                                   

We all heard our mothers say it. We'd roll our eyes as the middle-aged women in our lives would say,"You just wait. You'll understand one day." Well, guess what, Mama? That day is here. I understand!!!!!! This aging thing sucks, for the most part. I very much love feeling liberated and knowing that my knowledge has been earned by years in the trenches. However, there are a few things about this process that can go stick somethin where the sun don't shine(yes, Mrs. Mooney, I know that isn't proper grammar).

Example number one:  Having zits sucks. Having wrinkles sucks even more. Having them both at the same time sucks more than a hungry baby with a bottle of similac.  Why do we women have to suffer this at the same time that we are also noticing those little folds and creases in our eyelids?! Come on, you know you have them too! Seriously, though, it is making me crazy. Give me zits or give me wrinkles. Please don't give me both at the same time. What's up with that?! This 40-year-old skin sucks.

Example number two:  Squint, squint.  Need I say more? I sure hope my children's lives don't depend on me reading the fine print on medicine bottles. I couldn't do it if you paid me a million dollars and threw in a twinkie.  I. Can't. See. Remember when it was humorous to see someone holding those little bottles and packets at arm's length in order to read them? Laugh no more, ladies. It is real. It sucks.

Example number three:  It's HOT! My beloved doctor continues to assure me that my hormones are fine. I beg to differ. I go to bed and I wake up looking like someone doused me with a bucket of water. I feel perfectly fine at bedtime. Nice and snuggled, I fall asleep in a comfortable room temperature of 68 degrees. My side of the bed is probably closer to 52 degrees due to the oscillating fan I have blowing full-force right beside me. This makes for many marital disputes. By morning, I look and feel like I've been working in the hot sun hoeing a garden or something. What's up with that? Give me one body temperature, please. Sweating sucks.

Example number four:  I've got friends in low places. Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talkin about. Our "friends" are a little lower now. Push-up bras don't really help. I cinch those suckers as high as I can get 'em and the end result is always the same......my friends aren't as high-up as they used to be. Low-ridin sucks.

Example number five:  Less hair on the head.....more hair where ya dread. I will just leave it at that. Explanation not needed. If you are between the ages of 38 and 99, you know exactly what I am talking about, girls! Just wait.....you'll understand one day!

Somebody please tell me........is it just me or is it HOT IN HERE?!

Stay on the Ship!!!!

A good captain always goes down with his ship. In light of the recent cruise ship tragedy, I've pondered this line more than normal lately.  Why did he abandon ship? Was he more worried about himself than those who had trusted him with their lives(obviously)? I love a good cruise with good friends. I just don't know of anything I love more....not kidding. Speaking of friends.......are you willing to go down with your friends' ship? I hope I am not a fair-weather friend. If you are my true friend, I really am willing to go down with your ship. I will fight beside you 'til the bitter end. Don't ever doubt it.  I have a few friends that I KNOW would do the same for me. These people are worth more than gold to me. Real friends will always go down with your ship.

I have had the pleasure of the most fabulous friends in my life. There are my friends from elementary school. So many of them are etched into the core of my being. I have friends from junior high, from high school and church youth group.  There are several college buddies and friends from my very first job. There are "couple" friends that Kevin and I have made through the years.

 There are sista-friends(you know who you are) that are truly like family to me. I have a couple girlfriends that would truly probably be able to have me arrested if they told all my deepest, darkest secrets. HAAAA. Not really. Well, maybe. Which of these friends would I be willing to go down with? Let's see.......

There's the friend who drove me to the hospital as I was in labor with my first-born. Not only did she drive me there, but she AND HER HUSBAND stayed with us and videoed the joyous time. Yeah, I think I'd go down with her ship! There's the friend who always(and I mean always) remembers my birthday....we've been friends for *cough cough* 39 years. Ship= me too.  I have a friend I have seen face-to-face only once. That was nearly 30 years ago.  We became penpals....only we were more than penpals. We wrote each other heartfelt, blood and tears letters that were 18 to 30 pages long....front AND back! In pen! We are now in touch via the great internet. Hellloooo Baby, I'm stayin on your ship!

 I have a very special friend whose mother literally plucked pencil lead out of my white behind! Yeah, that was the night we jumped into the vehicle to avoid being late for curfew. I landed on the tip of a pencil. Sister, I will be on your ship til it sinks! My precious friend from high school who was my sidekick in every situation definitely gets a "no abandonment pass!" We skipped school, assisted each other in coverups, and even became trendsetters(i.e. records in the ponytails, ladies)together. Yeah, I'm on that ship! There are a couple of "guy friends" who made me laugh til I thought my gut would bust....one of them threw a pillow at my parents' house during a study session and broke my mother's lamp above the table. Love that friend....I'm on your ship, buddy! 

I have a friend who went through a painful divorce. I truly felt like I was going through it with her. I wanted to HURT him. Seriously. Hurt. Him.  We have all moved on since then, but at the moment, I was more than willing to conspire against the slime. You know who you are. Your ship is safe with me.  Another friend has been my rock for 14 years. She pulls me up by my bootstraps and doesn't let me wallow in misery.  She is the "stable one" and keeps us in line. Her ship won't be going down without me on it. Listen up, you two crazy cruisers, no muster drill is needed. I'll go down with your ship!!!!!

 There are so many not listed. I could write page after page about different people.  My point is......do you have the type of friends who would jump ship when you needed them? Are YOU that type of friend?  A good captain goes down with his ship. Will you? I hope I'm a good captain. I think if you take care of your friends' ships, they will take care of yours.  Isn't that what life's all about anyway? Don't abandon ship!

Red and Yellow, Black and White....All are Precious in His Sight!

You know what they say about opinions? Yeah, we've all got one....this is only my second official blog post, so let me go ahead and say it now--- I WILL offend people. This blog is not an account of my daily life or of my children's activities and accomplishments. This is my attempt to have somewhat of an editorial of my very own. I enjoy writing, but I haven't been able to find the right niche for my ramblings. This may or may not be a permanent blog. I'd like to think that what I have to say could be interesting to someone. If it isn't interesting to you, don't read it. If it is interesting to you, WELCOME!

Today, I'd like to focus on "Red and Yellow, Black and White....All are precious in His sight." I sang this song as a little child in church....Jesus loves the little children; all the children of the world. Red and yellow, black and white. All are precious in His sight. Jesus loves the little children of the world!!!!!" In fact, I can still picture myself sitting on the piano bench beside my beloved Uncle John as he played the tune and we sang it together. Oh, how those words have such a deep meaning for me now. If red and yellow, black and white are all precious in His sight, should we also sing,"Gay and Straight, big and small, Jesus really loves them all?" I mean, really. I want to set something STRAIGHT about growing up with a gay uncle. That's right, Backwoods  Bible Thumping family members, I said it. If you have a problem with it being out there, you might want to figure out a way to change it. You CAN'T change it. You can't change someone's true self. Get over it. It is 2012 and it is time we all realize that hate breeds hate. Stop it. Stop treating others like second-class citizens just because they are not just like YOU. I'd like to talk a bit about my most cherished uncle.


John Wyatt Poole was 13 when I came into the world at 5 pounds, 13 ounces. I was the apple of his eye. He was my first best friend. We were co-conspirators and partners in crime. Granny took us with her in her Buick as we traveled the gravel roads of Attala County. In those days, seat belts weren't the law. I would sit in John's lap and look out over the dash as Granny drove like a bat out of the hot place on those twisty, dusty roads. She would talk and talk and talk as we laughed and drank ice-cold Coke from the glass bottle out of Pappy's garage Coke machine. It was John who first taught me the art of sarcasm. I owe that trait to him and him alone. His nickname for me was "Mode." As a child, I was with my grandparents 5 out of 7 days of the week. Granny's disciplinary action for me was to make me go into the bathroom(it was in the dead center of the house--two doors, no windows) and sit on the closed toilet lid and "think about" what I had done. John found this to be quite amusing and would say,"They call her MODE because she likes to sit on it!" He called me Mode 'til the day he died...oh, the day he died......January 28, 1992. I digress.....we will come back to that day another time.


John told me my first ghost story. It was because of him that I was convinced Casper was coming through the old, creaky house every single time the wind blew. It was because of him I was scared to death to open the closet door in his bedroom that led up a steep, dusty staircase into the forbidden attic. John also taught me the learned skill of "flipping" your flip flops when you walk. I can still hear his distinct,"flip, flip, flip" if I close my eyes just right. John taught me how to break apart my oreos and soak them in my milk to make chocolate milk. He taught me to read sheet music and the love of playing an instrument. He taught me that one of the funniest things in the world is to rhyme someone's name with a funny word....i.e. Maria has diarrhea(Maria was my great aunt). I still laugh at that. Danny has a big fanny(Danny is my dad). Bob the Snob(that's my uncle....John's brother). As a child, I didn't have a clue what it meant to be gay or straight. Nor did I care. I just knew I loved Uncle John and I had no doubt that he loved me more than life. I knew he was unlike anyone else I had ever met. He was MY Uncle John and I was the luckiest little girl in the world.


John was the first person to introduce me to sunbathing. I didn't say he taught me all the RIGHT things! We would take towels and spread them on the hot, hard concrete of Granny's porch and just plop ourselves there with BABY OIL and IODINE! Granny would bring us iced water and anything else we demanded. Thanks, Uncle John, for all the freckles and yearly dermatology bills!!!!!! I remember when John began cosmetology school. Someone please tell me why people in my family found it necessary to "hide" the fact that John was gay?!!! Was it not obvious? Anyway, I became his hair model. When I was in eighth grade, he cut my hair so short that I looked like a boy. My mother almost killed him! John played the piano like nobody's business. He played at church and any event where he was asked. He also had the most beautiful voice. My uncle gave of himself so that others could enjoy and worship. He was happiest in those moments.


Uncle John eventually moved away from Small Town, Mississippi so that he could be himself and live his life.  He was shunned and he was treated as if his life meant nothing. Literally. What I regret MOST in my life is that I didn't stand up for him more back then. I was young and I was scared. I was scared of speaking my mind and standing up for what I believed to be right. Maybe that is why I am so incredibly outspoken today. If you knew me back then, I am sure you remember me as being outspoken. I was definitely not afraid to speak up in most cases. However, when it came to "family secrets," I was silenced. NO MORE!!! My Uncle John knew I loved him. For that, I am proud. He died at the age of 32. He died a horrific death. Many family members pretended he didn't exist. I would like to challenge you. Please don't be silenced. Stand up for others. Let them know you care.  Don't let the ignorance continue. Just remember ....red and yellow, black and white....all are precious in His sight.

Until next time.....

Plastic...just say NO!

Plastic...it's all around us. We use it to purchase things we don't really need. We use it to bag our groceries. We use it for storing food. Look around you. As I look around my over-privileged community, I see way too much plastic. Fake boobs, fake teeth, fake hair, fake nails, fake flat stomachs, fake little deviant smiles. I only hope that I am teaching my children not to be plastic people. Don't get me wrong. If cash were flowing into our bank account and we didn't have other obligations, I'd have a tummy tuck in a New York minute! I don't mind the plastic surgery. It's the plastic personalities that really gripe my hide. I get so sick of watching grown women act like pre-pubescent girls as they stab each other in the back time and time again. Why do we subject ourselves to this behavior as adults? Please, women, stand up and be real. Don't let some wanna-be-mean girl dictate to you who your friends will be and what type of clothing you will choose. Just be true to yourself. It is so very freeing. To my sweet offspring, don't be plastic people. Love who you are and be proud of it! :-) Until next time......